Singaporean Jokes

TEACHER: Ah Kau, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much will                     your father still have?
AH KAU: $10.
TEACHER: You don't know maths?
AH KAU: You don't know my father la!


MOTHER: David, come here.
DAVID: Yes mum.
MOTHER: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
DAVID: But, but but... I will only get my report card tomorrow.
MOTHER: I know that, but I'm going Hong Kong tomorrow, so I'm scolding you                    now.


FATHER: Why did you fail your Mathematic test?
SON: On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8.
FATHER: So?
SON: On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8. On Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can't         make up her mind, how i know the right answer?


GIRL: Do you love me?
BOY: Yes Dear.
GIRL: Would you die for me?
BOY: No la, mine is underlying love only.


MAN: How old is your father?
BOY: Same as me la.
MAN: How can that be?
BOY: He only became a father when i was born.


TEACHER: Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same  as your                         brother's. Did you copy his?
SIMON: No la teacher, its the same dog.


FATHER: Your teacher says, she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
SON: Thats why i tell you she is no good!


TEACHER: Where were you born?
STUDENT: Singapore, Sir.
TEACHER: Which part?
STUDENT: All of me la...


A boy came home from school with his exam results.
"What did you get?" asked his father.
"My marks are under water," said the boy.
"What do you mean underwater?"
"There are all C (sea) level."